The peace of God

"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. "  John 14:27

From the very beginning of a Christian, to the very end of a Christian's life, we have God's peace. It touches our lives without us even realising it. This week, my niece was touched and blessed with God's peace. May she hold it close to her every day of her life. It is easy on days like an infants Baptism, watching a small vulnerable infant anointed with God's grace, to feel this peace inside our hearts. Surrounded by friends and family, for this short while the abundance of God's grace and peace is flowing around us. Much like the wine at Cana, the gifts of the Holy Spirit shine. At the end of the day, we all part, the warm glow begins to dissipate and so does the shining radiance of God's grace. This has not really gone, it is still flowing with the same abundance as earlier, we have just stopped focussing on it.

So then we go out into our lives and face it's challenges. Some days, when God's creation shines in all it's almighty beauty, we focus on God's gifts of peace. It almost warms our hearts and we can sit back and bask in this wonderful gift. Other days, the weather is bleak our lives fall apart and we go looking desperately for something we can not find. We all have days of dark doubts, when we question where is God's peace among all this pain. All seems lost. For me those days were most abundant when I was a teenager. I wrangled with deep pain and questions. Many of which took many years to answer. I never lost my faith, in fact I did the opposite, I grabbed onto it with both hands hoping it would save me. It did.  Though I questioned at many times point of it all. 

When things are going well, it is easy to bend that ear to listening to God. The quiet tune of peace is obviously dancing in front of us and hope in the future comes easily. When it is dark, claustrophobic and daunting, listening to God is the last thing we want to do. We turn in on ourselves, listening to our own desires. Through the fog of despair, it is hard to see the light of hope. I am lucky that I saw the value of my faith, without it and the guiding patient hand of my husband to be, I am not sure I would have found that peace again. Regularly attending Church even when I did not want to, regularly praying when I felt no hope, is what eventually led me to find the overflowing gifts of God. 

We face challenging questions at the moment, questions of life and truths. Questions about the end of peoples lives, questions about when life starts and when we afford it such recognition, are just a couple of those. It is easy when we look at these, to revel in the depths of despair. How bleak our future will be.  They are hard questions. I very much hope that my niece will grow up in a world that values her uniqueness. Where life is valued and preserved and peace reigns across all the earth. But then I hoped that when my own children were born, I could lose hope.

But I have not. I have learned that even when things seem beyond hope, they are not. I have learnt not only to grab onto my faith with blind faith. My eyes are open, my ears are pricked and I will listen to what God has to say. It may not be easy and it may not always be what I want, but it is the gracious gift of peace. With it, all inner turmoil is stilled from the very moment I choose to listen.