Called to prayer

Sitting in the sunshine in the hammock the other day watching the many clouds float by, swinging gently back and forth. The background noise of city life hanging in the air but not imposing itself in my space. The sounds of bird song dominated and I just felt an enormous wave of gratitude and grace. It was just one of those moments when I was immensely thankful for the many blessings we have received in this life. It occurred to me, that I was most grateful for the relative silence and solitude.
  For me, as a clergy spouse, Church is very rarely a private encounter with God. It is hard to concentrate on building a relationship, when you have a thousand and one things on your mind, when people want to talk and when you are aware that everyone has a point of view on how you as a family chose to worship and sometimes even just how you live. The last few weeks have been very private encounters with Christ, both at Mass and as I have lived my life. There has been time, space, peace and quiet to allow my relationship build up again. I had not realised quite how distracted I had been by the mechanics of Parish life, how far my focus had drifted.
  But swinging in that hammock, seeing a glimmer of a rainbow forming on it's edge, I was reminded of God's promise and became aware with quite a jolt of how much closer I have got to God in this period of time. It feels very much like I have been called to prayer in the silence, the space, the gaps. It feels like a breath of fresh air in my lungs and I have been able to spend my time learning, re-reading and praying. The consequence being that I have developed and reaffirmed my faith, found the ability again to just place my life at his feet and to discern the direction I should be taking in my relationship with Christ. It really is in the silence and stillness that we hear the most.